It’s no secret that motherhood can be overwhelming, but add on running a business and you have a challenging world full of pressure, elation, happiness, guilt, pride and a million more emotions…
In the world we live in, being portrayed as a mother on social media can carry quite a burden – having to always look and act the part, but in reality it can be quite the opposite.
As a team of mums who support each other in business and in life, we decided to sit down and answer some Q+A’s all about how we really feel with this juggling act we call #bossmumlife.
Here’s PART EIGHT through the eyes of working mothers…
Laura (Senior Account Manager at Southern Cross Austereo and Co-founder of the Yap Podcast, Mum to twins Havana Yves & Stella Ray 21 months)
“I have the biggest purpose in the world to be the best mum I can be.”
- What do you believe are the pro’s and con’s of being self employed and having kids?
PRO’S – Feeling like you have an adult life again, being yourself and feeling like your old self, interacting with adults and dressing up. I feel like I work smarter knowing that I won’t stay back late anymore and time is so precious.
CON’S – Missing them, feeling guilty leaving them, and not being able to know what they eat and how they sleep.
- What are your tips for self motivation/banishing procrastination if you are overly tired/stressed from kids?
Coffee, and in all seriousness waking up before they do is key for me! I also advise getting organised the night before with day care clothes out, dinner sorted, and my outfit sorted. Writing a fresh list helps me each morning. If you can find a quiet space at work and do the most crucial job that’s hanging over your head the rest of the day just feels awesome because you have done the job that was burdening.
- Do you find yourself comparing yourself to other mums?
NO WAY! I am pretty sure of who I am, and I have grown so much since becoming a mum – I think I am a great mum in my own way and do my best and that’s all you can do. You have to celebrate the small wins and be proud of the little things you do that make you feel like a good mum. I unfollowed a lot of ungenuine Instagram accounts when I started thinking down that path!
- Do you feel pressure to over achieve as a mum/career woman and ‘have it all’?
Yes but only from myself, I have worked on this a lot and I think if I can achieve 1 – 3 chores or job a day I’m winning at life. They may be small things like hanging a load of washing out or washing my hair. Pressure is evil and so your mind can be aswell!
- Do you experience mum guilt when you have to pick your kids up or have kids around and you have to answer calls? Do you tell clients the truth or lie about what you are doing?
I actually ring them back when I can as I am very much present on my days off. If my kids are quiet I sometimes answer but start with “hey it’s my day off” so if I have kids screaming I let my clients know I’ll call them back and usually every client loves my honestly and understands.
- How has having your insanely epic podcast The Yap helped becoming a working mum?
I would say our guests are so inspiring, having that private intense space to talk about everything in a roundabout way is therapy and is super inspiring!!! It’s certainly added more responsibility to my life and commitment however I think one day my girls will say wow mum that’s really cool! I also love that fact that we get so many loving messages from mums around the world thanking us for being so raw and also saying they don’t feel lonely anymore – that was my goal and getting those DM’s makes it all worth it.
- Were you excited to get back to work after maternity leave or had anxiety?
I was ready big time, having no family here I was literally struggling having 2 babies hanging off me so I was really amped and ready to go back. Part-time so I have eased into it. My anxiety was leaving the girls at day-care for the first few months – it rattled me but as soon as I drove off cranked the music and drank my coffee I felt great!
- How did you cope becoming a mum for the first time with twins and putting kids as first priority over career?
I forgot about my career entirely there was no energy to even think about that. I didn’t care about work or my phone or emails – I immersed myself into caring for the girls. It certainly ripped me a new one, I have had mental struggles I never want to feel again and slept deprivation got me bad but I believe as cheesy as it sounds I have grown so much from those first 18 months. I am stronger, I am more me than I have ever felt, and I have the biggest purpose in the world to be the best mum I can be.
- What advice can you give to other mums – whether they work for themselves, for someone else or are thinking of starting work again?
– Have a plan going back in to work
– Set realistic expectations
– Make sure you work for a supportive team
– Have a mentor to speak to (maybe a female who has returned from work with kids)
– If you work for yourself (even better) you can plan your days and be flexible
- Do you feel if you put more real content on social media of being a mum, that clients would view you as not ‘as motivated’?
UM NO and if so GOODBYE!!!!!!!!! Haha most of my clients demand photos of the girls. I don’t work with arseholes – life’s to short.
- What positive changes have you found in yourself since becoming a mother, that can help you day to day with clients?
Its opened a relatable conversation with other parents and I feel like I am more assertive.
- (Fill in the blanks) – Working mums should know that…
It takes time to enter back into work, so be kind to yourself as it wont ever be the same. Also be organised – you will thank yourself in the morning if you plan the night before.